When I was pregnant, I swore I wasn’t going to be that person who blogs about her child all the time. Guess who is going back on that promise? I am. Turns out, I actually want to be able to remember the little things about his life. You know, before it gets blurrier than it already is.
As it happens, having a child makes you lose track of time. One month old? I might as well skip straight to his three month update! Gah. Where is time going? I feel like I’m losing my little baby already!
I breathed a sigh of relief when Caelen hit one month. I had managed to keep him alive for a whole month. Despite the slightly rocky start. We were all good and I felt like I was starting to finally get things under control. Kind of. Because, honestly, I have a baby. Is anything going to be ‘under control’ ever again? I am highly skeptical.
Adjusting to life with a baby has been hard. You’re in a safe little bubble when you’re pregnant and when you are at the hospital. All that bursts as soon as you walk out of the doors and you suddenly have a helpless little baby (aka poop machine) that is suddenly attached to your boob 24/7. I’m not joking. About to have a shower? Think again. About to sit down for dinner? Not likely. Need to go to the bathroom? Ha, better luck next time. Scratch that. Go to the bathroom. Your pelvic floor muscles are shit and no one wants to deal with that. I repeat: Go to the bathroom.
Caelen is a happy baby. I swear. He hasn’t smiled yet, but he is always flapping around and making happy cooing noises. It is cute. I know every mother thinks that her child is the best, brightest, and cutest, but it is true when it comes to Caelen. Biased, no? However, he does have a bit of a temper on him. I wonder where he gets that from. I’m bottle feeding him and if you don’t have the bottle ready for the exact moment he decides that he’s hungry…Well, you’re going to be in deep. shit. Boy has a set of lungs on him already!
He absolutely hates having his diaper and clothes changed. That boy does not like being naked. His face goes bright red and his whole body goes kind of stiff. Because that’s conductive to changing clothes, right?
On the other hand, he absolutely loves bath time, morning cuddles (and TV time) with his grandparents, and snuggling up with his mama. My mother and I worked hard to make bath time a fun time. Happy voices, lots of toys, a warm room, and a calm demeanour no matter what happens. It’s amazing how much a baby can pick up on. I think we need to give them more credit. They are smart.
He is a very strong baby. He has been holding his head up from day one. He is still a wee babe, so we’ve had to work on it. He can, however, push against you to look in your eye for about .5 seconds before he gets a rather dangerous head nod on. Have you ever had a newborn’s head hit you in the face? It hurts. A lot.
The first month has been hard. Caelen is one month old, but I’m also one month into my new life. My new self. I can’t even imagine going back to my old life now. I don’t want it. I don’t miss it, and I’m still convinced that I’m not missing out on anything. My relationships with my friends and family have changed, but I wouldn’t trade it for anything. I run though everything I need before I have to go anywhere: baby bag. capsule, stroller, bottles and formula, pacifier, toys, keys, child. I’m still guaranteed to forget something. Like his bed. And my pants (but that is a story for another time).
Parenthood. It is messy. It is frustrating. It is challenging.
It is rewarding. It is love. It is everything.
And I wouldn’t have it any other way.