10 Reasons Why Being Single Sucks

I am well-known for being the single friend.

I am used to this. I am perpetually single. This, however, is not because I don’t try. I try. Probably more than you think I do. I am just incredibly picky when it comes to relationships and I have no issue whatsoever with cutting people out of my life if I don’t think they’re good for me. I have been on more than enough first dates to know the ‘red flags’. That being said, being single sucks. Being single can really suck sometimes. I’m not pretending that it is butterflies and rainbows all the time.

I am independent. I have a lot of things that I enjoy doing and things that I believe all single girls should enjoy doing. Because heck, we can (and should) do a lot more than sit around knitting, hoarding cats, and waiting for “Prince Charming” to come along. I hate to say this, but if you’re a male and in my life then you’re there because I want you to be, not because I need you.

Being Single (And Why It Sucks) Kendel @ Little Misadventures

That being said, if you’re of the male variety and in my life, then you should know that I have a lot of respect for you. I will always make time for you – no matter what. I may not need you, but wanting you in my life means more. A lot more.

Sometimes you just want someone.

I want a person. Not a tiny human being that relies on me for everything, but just someone who is “all mine”. Sounds possessive, no? Sometimes I just want to know that I have a person out there somewhere that cares about me and wants to spend time with me…even when I snore and steal all the blankets.

Cooking skills become limited.

I do know a recipe or two, but they aren’t part of an extensive list. I know maybe five recipes off my heart. Ten on a really good day. I don’t really think about it, because I only have to cook for myself. Why should I care if I’m eating chicken for the fourth time this week? Not just my cooking skills, but eating alone. Always. It can get to you after a little while.

Not being in love.

I am the hugest cynic that you will meet. I rarely think that things are going to work out and if they are working out, then I’m constantly waiting for that other shoe to drop. I have learned that sometimes there isn’t another shoe. I go to the city a lot, so I see couples a lot. Everywhere. Seeing how in love they are does hurt sometimes. I miss it. If being crazy in love with someone who feels the same way was an option, I think I know what I’d pick. I don’t know about you, but I’ve been single for a long time, and being single can really suck when all your friends are coupled up.

Loneliness.

It doesn’t happen a lot, but I do get lonely. So lonely that I consider going back to an ex-boyfriend or partner of mine. I know, so shoot me. It’s the familiarity that gets me. I just want a person who really knows me. An ex is the most logical step, no? Rational me knows that I won’t go back to an ex, but lonely, single me is a completely different person. Good thing I’ve got her under lock and key 90% of the time 😉

Not having someone to share stuff with.

I have to admit: not a lot happens to me. But when it does, I always want to tell someone who is close to me. When I’m dating someone, they are the person that I want to share things with. Good, bad, embarrassing, borings – anything. If something happens to me, then you can guarantee that I want to share it with someone. Being single sucks when you realise that you don’t have that ‘person’. That isn’t your friends or family.

That damned cold side of the bed.

It is a real problem. I sleep in a ball so I don’t get cold. I remember that a male is like a portable, cuddly heater. He keeps the bed warm…even when you’re already melting. Winter is the worst. Nothing makes you more aware of your single status than winter.

I’m sick.

When I was little, I had family to take care of me when I was sick. Pain killers, good ice blocks, ice packs and all the tea that I could stomach. I got food poisoning last year, and whilst I was glad I was alone, it would have been nice to have someone there to keep me entertained between the bouts of throwing up. Everyone likes being looked after, whether it’s in sickness or health. We like to know that people care. 

Answering those pesky questions.

I feel like I constantly have to justify myself to people who are coupled up and in their love bubble. Sorry that I’m not riding the love train, but I am happy (most of the time). Yes, this is a choice. No, I am not crazy (yet). I came up with a list of phrases and believe me, I have heard them all.

Not having someone who is there for you.

I miss having someone who would put me first or drop whatever they’re doing to help me #whipped. Kidding. I have friends and family who would do those things, but you just get to a stage when you want someone that you haven’t known your whole life. When you’re single, you are pretty much the only person you have. Sometimes that’s okay, but sometimes it reminds you how much being single can suck. Only sometimes.

Physical affection.

I’m not talking about sex, but that’s nice, too. I’m talking about a hug, a kiss on the cheek or being able to cuddle together. The normal everyday things. They are the physical things that make me fall for a person. Physical touch and quality time are my strongest love languages. Getting a hug from a friend is nice, but the emotional connection isn’t there. Not really. So, potential boyfriends, please just hold my hand. That is all I really need.


This wasn’t meant to be a sob story, but I just thought that I’d point out that I am a human and I do miss people. Sometimes.

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52 thoughts on “10 Reasons Why Being Single Sucks

  1. This is perfect and 100 percent accurate. I’m going through a recent(ish) breakup and so many people (especially those in couples) don’t get that sure I can get over the actual person, but it’s all of these things that make me sad, lonely and sometimes keep me up at night. It’s having that person, you’re person, that’s there through EVERYTHING. They will listen when you fight with your friends or when you’ve had an awful day and for some reason, even when they know you’re not the one who’s in the right will make you feel better about the whole situation. Ugh.

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    1. It’s the little pieces of the relationship and memories that make it the hardest thing. My last break up was my decision and pretty good, so I have no hard feelings but god, I do miss him a little bit. Just a good conversationalist and all that jazz. He’s still the person (in part) that I want to tell everything to…but that might just be because we’re friends. It’s weird. I don’t know ha. YES. Having a person, especially one who will stick up for you no matter what, is golden. Better than golden. It’s just…rare. I really do miss that…probably the most out of everything.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I totally relate! I had to get an extra blanket for my bed and an electric blanket to replace my ex boyfriend haha. When I was really sick earlier this year I was desperate for someone to look after me. Most of the time I feel fine but sometimes I just feel desperately alone.

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  3. A colleague at work once said to me “there’s always someone out there if you lower your standards enough” …………..straight up he said this! Not happening btw!

    I’ll tell you something I’d like to do with a partner, lay on a sofa both naked under blankets and cuddling while watching a movie.

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  4. Even though I’ve been in a relationship for nearly 6 years I can still relate to some of these points. When I moved to university my boyfriend and I spent a year living apart and that was really difficult. We Skyped every single night but I missed that physical interaction of cuddling and holding hands.

    If I wasn’t in a relationship I would definitely miss having someone to take care of me when I’m sick. When I have steroid injections I physically can’t get out of bed so my bf really is my saviour!

    You will find the perfect person for you some day. Probably when you least expect it. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I can’t even imagine what that would have been like! I’m bad when I don’t get to see someone for a couple of weeks haha. A year would drive me ’round the twist I think.

      I’m sure I will! I’ve already met quite a few people in unexpected situations! Might have met a beautiful human being on the beach and we’re still “hanging out” three months later. Shhh, it’s a secret 😉

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  5. Wow wow wow. Those first couple of paragraphs completely describe me as well.

    The thing I struggle with most about being single is how stagnant life feels when you’re not experiencing it with someone else. I just want someone to get to know and to make memories with.

    Erin | beingerin.com

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    1. I get that feeling too! I see heaps of pretty things when I’m out and about, just driving around and I always think OH THAT IS SO COOL…but it would be a lot better if I could share that moment with someone. There’s good moments of being alone and sometimes being alone just gets to be a bit too much 😦

      That’s the good thing about blogging though. We may not be there but we still get to see the same thing at the end of the day. That’s part of the reason why I love blogging 😄 You still get to share things with everyoneeeee.

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      1. Definitley just like a cuddle buddy 😉 depends how upgraded they get. But you could literally be like…
        “Look mate I just wanna be warm at night, I don’t want you hanging around all the time, leaving the bathroom door open when you pee, if you want to make me dinner and take me out I guess ill put up with it, but I just want a warm buff body at night, is that cool?!”

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  6. This was just… really good! I’m with you on the physical touch. It’s my main love language, and sometimes not having anyone can be sad (especially when almost all your friends have someone :P)
    Thanks for the post!

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  7. It is very hard for many of us Good single men to find a woman nowadays that is Not very high maintenance, independent, selfish, spoiled, greedy, and very money hungry, which is the real reason why many of us are Single since so many women want the Best today and will Never settle for Less. And God forbid should they ever go with a man that makes much Less money than they do. Where are the Good women out there today that are Not like that?

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    1. I think it’s good that women won’t ‘settle for less’. Would you want a woman to be with you because she was settling or because she thought you were the best person and ‘The One’ for her? I think we both know the answer to that question. Haha. You’ll find that an independent woman is probably the best one to be with too. No one likes a stage five clinger 😉

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  8. Came home from work tonight and cracked open a cold one and that inevitable little voice whispered, ‘Drinking alone again, eh?’ Yep, I am. I do most everything alone. No biggie. But….I went to Google and typed in “being alone sucks sometimes” just to see what I’d get and I landed here. Being alone all the time hasn’t bothered me as much now that I’m older as it did when I was younger. I guess now I’m just used to the space….but sometimes it would be nice to have someone around. Someone you could turn to and share your day, or that thought you just had, or that amazing sunset. Yeah, that would be awesome.

    Of course, it doesn’t help that my last few relationships the women made Jezebel seem like Mother Theresa. That kind of puts the damper on my enthusiasm for seeking another one. But now I have a new job and it’s been a while since I’ve been involved in such a social circle (I was a freelance graphic designer for a long time-always at home, alone…ya know). Now there’s women at work and I’m starting to feel that twinge of aloneness more than usual. Dang it…..dang job…dang internet. Curse you Google, lol.

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    1. Well, being single does suck sometimes! Humans are social creatures. It’s written into us to be around people. Lord knows that I get crazy (and lonely) if I’m only with my son (and parents) all day long. I absolutely find myself craving people my own age! That’s usually how the vicious cycle starts. Haha. I’m definitely used to being on my own now, but it is nice to share the simple things every now and again 🙂

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  9. Well, I’m 20 years older, divorced and a Mom, but what I’ve written about being single (the bad) is pretty similar 🙂
    On the plus side, when you do need a warm body / conversation and all that, you can seek it out. I’ve found there’s less judgment about being sexually free at my age than when I was 20. So there’s that…

    Ann
    xo
    http://annstvincent.com

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    1. Right?! Why is there so much stigma about a woman getting laid when a man is a hero? It makes me so mad! I definitely feel *slightly* different about being single now that I’m a mum too…but there is that ‘social’ part written into our very being. I haven’t gone on a date (or had sex) in almost a year! It’s almost hard to believe that I’ve managed to have a child with the way my social life looks at the moment!

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      1. I’m a hero to my blog tribe but in “real life” it’s quite different.
        And although it’s probably not a popular thing to say, having my son only 50% of the time has been a great way for me to have a social and dating life at the same time!

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  10. Well since so many women nowadays like sleeping around with so many different men all the time which that would certainly do it unfortunately. And it is very unfortunate that most of the women today just want a man with money as well since they will usually take advantage of these men anyway since they’re nothing but users and losers anyway since they just can’t commit to many of us good men and accept us for who we really are.

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